Idealmyth Archives - The Ideal Myth

The myth of the ideal: Debunk the ideal myth

August 11, 2025May 30, 2025 by The Ideal Myth

From childhood, we’re fed stories about the “ideal”:

The ideal career, The ideal partner and The ideal lifestyle

Even the ideal version of ourselves.

It’s everywhere- in advertisements, on social media, in self-help books, and even in casual conversations. But here’s the truth many people spend years learning the hard way:

There is no such thing as “ideal.” It’s a myth- beautifully packaged, widely sold, and profoundly deceptive.

This post dives deep into why the concept of the “ideal” is flawed, why real life doesn’t- and shouldn’t- mirror perfection, and what we can pursue instead to lead more grounded, meaningful lives.

1. The Myth of the Ideal: Where Does It Come From?

The ideal is an illusion created and perpetuated by:

Media: We’re shown highlight reels of success, beauty, and luxury, rarely the struggle behind them.
Societal standards: Cultures often establish benchmarks of what’s considered “ideal”- ideal body type, marriage, career path, or financial success.
Comparisons: In the age of social media, we constantly measure our reality against someone else’s curated image.
Fear of inadequacy: Striving for an ideal gives us a false sense of direction, a “perfect” destination that seems to promise worth and happiness.

But here’s the problem- the ideal is subjective, ever-changing, and unattainable.

2. Why There Can Be Nothing Truly Ideal

To understand why ideals don’t work, we must acknowledge a few truths:

a. Life is Fluid

Circumstances change. People evolve. What seems perfect today may be irrelevant tomorrow. There is no static point in life where everything aligns “perfectly” forever.

b. Perfection is a Moving Target

Even when we achieve what we once believed was ideal- a job, a relationship, a body weight- it often doesn’t feel as fulfilling as we imagined. Why? Because our definition of “ideal” shifts with time, maturity, and context.

c. Ideal Leaves No Room for Growth

Perfection leaves no space for trial, error, or failure. Yet real growth happens in the mess, the mistakes, and the moments of uncertainty. An ideal scenario discourages experimentation and flexibility.

d. Ideal = Pressure

The pursuit of perfection creates overwhelming pressure to perform, conform, and achieve. It leads to burnout, anxiety, self-doubt, and imposter syndrome- not peace or fulfilment.

3. The Problem with Expecting the Ideal

Expecting ideal outcomes leads to:

• Disappointment

Reality rarely lives up to fantasy, so we constantly feel let down, even by good things.

• Self-Criticism

When we fall short of the “ideal,” we blame ourselves, not the unrealistic standard we were chasing.

• Relationship Damage

Expecting ideal behaviour from others- partners, friends, and family- can lead to frustration, disconnection, and unfair resentment.

• Stunted Progress

Waiting for the perfect time, idea, or opportunity often leads to inaction. Progress, not perfection, is the real driver of success.

4. What to Strive for Instead of Ideal

Here’s what works better than perfection:

Suitability

Look for what fits you- your values, goals, personality- not what looks ideal on paper or Instagram.

Alignment

Instead of perfect outcomes, aim for alignment. Are your actions aligned with your purpose? Are your choices aligned with your needs and values?

Adaptability

Life is unpredictable. Choose flexibility over flawlessness. The ability to adapt is far more valuable than perfection.

Sufficiency Over Perfection

Ask: Is this enough? Not: Is this perfect? Enough is realistic. Enough is peaceful.

5. Real-Life Examples: How Letting Go of Ideal Changes Everything

Career

Instead of waiting for your “dream job,” take the job that aligns with your skillset and provides growth. Use it as a stepping stone, not a final destination.

Relationships

Stop comparing your relationship to Hollywood romances. Focus on communication, trust, and mutual growth- even if it’s not picture-perfect.

Self-Image

Instead of chasing the perfect body, focus on strength, energy, and self-care. Confidence comes from consistency, not comparison.

6. The Freedom in Letting Go

When you let go of the ideal:

You stop feeling like you’re failing.
You start appreciating what is instead of mourning what isn’t.
You create room for grace, self-compassion, and genuine fulfilment.

This doesn’t mean you stop striving- it means you start striving smarter. You build your life not on fantasy, but on foundations that support you as you are.

Real is the New Ideal

The ideal myth is deeply ingrained in our culture, but it’s time we see it for what it is: a trap.

Perfect doesn’t exist.

But real, honest, and aligned do.

Choose messy over manufactured, Choose genuine over glamorous and Choose reality- not because it’s easier, but because it’s true.

Because when you stop chasing ideal, you start living fully.

What is an Ideal Choice – Job or Business

July 31, 2021 by The Ideal Myth

We all must have once been into this discussion of what is the more appropriate thing to do. Whether it is a wise thing to do a job or to do a business. There are different opinions, viewpoints and perceptions of people towards this choice between doing a job for someone or doing your own business or being self-employed.

First of all, the concept of the ideal is a myth. It is a myth that certain things, situations, ideas or beliefs can be ideal. There is always a difference of opinion of some kind.

For one fresh graduate, getting a job that fulfils his need for money and financial security is the right thing. He might feel the risk involved in the business more than the stable job. For another fresh graduate, he might be seeing the risk but also positive about the opportunity and rewards for taking the risk.

When we talk about the choice between Job or business, there are many factors that play in between. Even there is no such thing as business always gets you more money and not the job. Also, it is not just about money, it is more about the satisfaction one gets out of it.

There cannot be one ideal thing that all can follow, but there can be a right thing for an individual which is more appropriate to them according to their skills, situation, personality and need.

It is also important to get into something which you are actually inclined to and not because somebody has a favorable outcome. If you’re willing to do business just because someone got successful in something. Also, if someone is progressing quickly into his current job doesn’t mean that everyone doing the same job would progress likewise. To have progress and be successful in the choice you make, You have to make a choice for the alternative that is more appropriate for you, suits your skills, fulfil your needs and you actually want to do it.

Factors that determine what is more appropriate in deciding the right choice: –

Depends on Individual

Identify your strengths and weakness, it will help you evaluate that what is more suitable for you. An entrepreneur might not be able to get the best results being an employee of the company. And a skilled employee may not be always become successful as an entrepreneur.

Each has its pros and cons

There is nothing wrong with being practical. You have to ensure that what would be the pros and cons of making a choice for any of the things.

Motivation

What motivates you best is the right thing for you. If you don’t feel motivated being an entrepreneur and it doesn’t excite you then there are very less chances that you can become successful in it. If an atmosphere of job, financial security and less risk feels more suitable and motivates you, then it is the right thing for you. It all depends on what motivates you more.

Myth about limitations

It is a myth that there are limitations in any of the choices. You don’t have to worry about any limitations. Till the time a person is dedicated and keen on doing his best by pushing themselves, no limitations would come in between getting success.

Current needs

Your current situation and need also are important factors to decide the right thing for you. Your present circumstances, financial condition, responsibilities, and future needs play an important factor for you to decide the right thing for the present. If you’re keen on doing business but your circumstances demand you to have financial stability, you can get a job. You always have a choice to switch when you have available resources and security.

The grass is always greener on the other side

It is an old saying that grass is always greener on the other side. We always see another person in a more comfortable and better position. It might not be right always. A person doing the job might envy the freedom of an entrepreneur and an entrepreneur might envy the limited burden of a person doing the job.

Verdict: You don’t have to look for the ideal thing, you have to focus on the right thing for you to do.

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13 Things We Expect To Be Ideal But It is an Ideal Myth

August 11, 2025August 26, 2020 by The Ideal Myth

13 Ideal things we expect to be ideal but it is an ideal myth

We struggle for ideal circumstances but it is a myth that there can be something like an ideal. There can be right and there can be wrong but is there anything we can expect as ideal?

We seek for ideal things and ideal circumstances in a world which is divided into countries, religion, ethnicity, caste and state. In the persistence to seek Ideal things and Ideal situation, we stop celebrating the things we have and savour the present moment.

We expect our partners to be ideal or perfect

We expect our job or business to be ideal

Ideal Myth is about the myth of our expectation of Ideal things and circumstances. It is not less than a Myth to expect something Ideal.

We wait for the situation, time to be ideal but It is a myth that there could be anything ideal. There are 13 things that we expect to be ideal but it is an Ideal Myth

1. Life

One of the biggest myth is to seek for an ideal life. I have seen people seeking for an ideal life. They envy the life of others and repent the things they have. Everyone has their struggles to deal with. We struggle for money, health, love and so many things. There is struggle always but can’t expect things perfect. The struggle doesn’t mean suffering as well.

2. Friendship

There is no need to explain much about it. We all have friends who are not all alike us and all perfect. Most of the times we know their ill-habits but we don’t mind. We know sometimes they annoy but we don’t mind. The imperfection and the realness in the relationship are what we don’t want to change. If we try to change or make rules about it, the very existence of the friendship would cease to exist. The flawed or the imperfect piece of friendship we rather can’t expect to be ideal.

3. Relationship

Every relationship is special and fragile in its way but is there any relationship which has never been into an argument or part of small fights. Is there any form of relationship which do not goes through ups and downs, never part of misunderstanding, no fights, no reconcile. Father-son, Mother-daughter, Young couples or elderly couples, at some point of time there are disagreements and differences. But can they be ideal? No, they Can’t.

So rather than expecting an ideal relationship, we should instead better understand the situation and should be keen to reconcile, forgive and empathize it. It might not make it ideal but strong.

4. Government

Government is run by individuals in groups and there cannot be everyone working with the same dedication or philosophy. Few Individuals wrongdoings cannot be exemplified as the face of the entire government as a sham. All fingers are not the same and we can’t them to be perfect. They might take some wrong decision and it is the right of its citizen to question them and needs to do in a civilized manner. Vandalism, violence and chaos like situation have now become common when any action of government is not acceptable. We can’t expect the government to be ideal and take perfect action all the time.

5. Job

If we look up for a job which provides better satisfaction and satisfy our long term goals, then it’s good. But expecting an Ideal Job where you don’t have to worry once we have it is a myth. We start as a beginner and we progress to different roles and responsibilities, pay scales and promotions. As we progress, we may require switching our job for new opportunities, learning new skills and knowledge to keep up.

6. Life Plans

Planning is necessary and one of the wise things to do. The question is all the planning in life works the way we plan. A well-earning job or business, marriage at 30, retirement at 50, one luxurious apartment, and many more things we plan. During the process of achieving it, we are spending the days, months and years of our life. Do we need to celebrate life when we have planned? No, we should celebrate or enjoy life when we find the opportunity to do so.

7. Ideal Circumstances

If we plan to start something, it’s always necessary to begin at the right time when most of the things are into your favorable. But if we wait to start something for things to get entirely into your favorable situation, we might not be able to start ever. Every time there may something which might not be the way we expect. So, in the situation either we should wait all the time to get it the way we want or we can begin if we find capable to deal with the situation.

8. Opinions

Our opinions and thoughts are often based on the values, principles, beliefs and our past experiences. It can differ between different individuals, groups, community and nation too. There can be different opinions on a single subject and there can be no one completely right or may not be completely wrong. An ideal opinion ceases to exist and is a myth.

9. Income

The income we want today, may not be enough a few years later. At present, we might find our superior’s income ideal but once we reach it, we urge to have more. It is nowhere wrong to crave more but can we reach to an ideal point. With the increase in income, we raise our lifestyle and living standards. Rather than expecting an ideal income, we should focus on the right avenues of investment for wealth creation.

10. Society

We know we want it the most but it is only a desire to have the ideal society but the reality of the society today itself bust the myth of Ideal Society. Political instability, inequality, religious conflicts, poverty, the war between countries, all of these things is enough to discard the notion of the ideal society.

11. Country

We all love the country where we are born and there is no doubt about it. Every citizen wishes for its country to be an ideal country which is free from any evils.

12. Solutions

When we suggest solutions or recommend something, we take the situation as generic. However hard we try we cannot get into the shoes of the person dealing with it. There can be real solutions which work on the actual and real problems. One ideal solution can’t be there for all the things.

13. Age

We have self- imposed on ourselves an ideal age to study, to retire, to learn anything or start something. There’s no ideal age for anything if you have any desire to pursue. It’s never late to pursue any passion, it’s never late to start your own business, never late to get married or get rid of any unwanted relationship.

The Ideal Myth is not about how things are not going to be perfect but instead, it is about how we shouldn’t waste our time getting perfect. In able to achieve or expecting ideal things, we stop living and savour the moment. It is completely alright to fail. There is no harm if you have made mistakes in life, you can begin now. Things would never be ideal but it is us who need to decide between all the chaos what is right for you and what’s not.

If you have something to add on to the list, kindly share in the comment section

We expect ideal circumstances to pursue any passion.